You Versus You, Except When You’re Boat Racing the Hell Out of the Rest of the PAX

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You Versus You, Except When You’re Boat Racing the Hell Out of the Rest of the PAX

QIC: Zima

Date: 7/28/26

PAX: El Chapo (DR), Starfish, Crash, Turnover, Drip, Lamb Chop, Zima

BEATDOWN.

 

Do the exercises at one end of the parking lot. Run to the other end, stopping in the middle to do 25 SSHs. Do the exercises, adding a new exercise and increasing all reps by one. Run back, stopping in the middle. Rinse and repeat.

 

Exercises: Perfect Burpees with a Clap, WWIIs, WMDs, Extended Arm Squats, Mountain Climbers, Dead Bugs, STS Merkins, KTG Lunges, Mike Tysons, Heels to Heaven

 

Round 1: Perfect Burpees with a Clap x 1, Run

Round 2: Perfect Burpees with a Clap x 2, WWIIs x 2, Run

Round 3: Perfect Burpees with a Clap x 3, WWIIs x 3, WMDs x 3, Run

Round 4: Perfect Burpees with a Clap x 4, WWIIs x 4, WMDs x 4, Extended Arm Squats x 4, Run

…

Round 12: All x 12 (everybody was on this round, but nobody finished)

 

DONE.

 

NMM.

  • Let’s get this out of the way now. Nobody listens. I don’t know why I even try. Love you guys.
  • And as usual, adherence to exercise instructions was exactly as expected. Most modifications were due to medical issues, potential auditory issues, intellectual disabilities, animosity towards the Q, apathy for the workout, or inability to count past the number four.
  • Is it IPC season already?
  • El Chapo would have left the PAX completely in the dust had the Q revealed the next exercise each round.
  • Lamb Chop wondered what I talk about when he doesn’t post. That’s a fair question.
  • Lamb Chop also wants to know what we say behind his back. We informed him that it’s exactly what we say to his face. Poor kid.
  • TO wished his PF Black Card hadn’t expired. This was definitely not a judgement free zone. (Still funny)
  • Starfish was throwing asterisks around like Halloween candy.
  • Crash repeatedly questioned his life choices, and somehow blamed many of them on Zima.
  • Drip questioned whether I spent more time on the preblast or my weinke. All I can say is that I spent a lot of time staring at the weinke yesterday wondering if it needed to be a little longer.
  • I’m sure nobody at Parliament called the Q an a-hole.
  • Crash repeatedly questioned his friendship choices. Zima was not included.
  • What’s left of Starfish became very testy in the last 7 minutes. The rest of the PAX definitely followed suit as the MC was taken to another level during the finale. Nobody was safe from the wrath.
  • Drip kept trying to convince himself out loud why he comes to workouts.
  • Turnover regretted not wearing his wife’s full stockings this morning when the knee-to-the-ground lunges were called.
  • Leave no man where you found him, except way way behind you.
  • Crash refused to workout one second longer than the time allotted. He then ensured nobody else could ever suffer that beatdown again by pilfering the cardboard.
  • Thanks guys! That was FUN!

 

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

  • GreeNest needs help. See Starfish!
  • Q School next Saturday. Location: TBD.
  • F3 softball was a fantastic time. Thanks to Slowpitch for organizing. See Ziffel for a full recount of the action.

 

PRAYERS:

  • None spoken.

 

Zima Out.

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