Tour de Draftee Stop #16: Iron Throne

QIC: Draftee

Date: 07-13-2026

PAX: Dr. Toot (WD), Zima, Whiteclaw (WB), Tammy, Tar Heel, and Draftee

The Thang

Seven kingdoms.

One throne.

The PAX conquered each kingdom together before advancing to the next.

The only mode of transportation between kingdoms was the Bear Crawl with a Push.

Kingdom 1

10 Squats

Kingdom 2

10 Squats
10 Monkey Humpers

Kingdom 3

10 Squats
10 Monkey Humpers
10 American Hammers

Kingdom 4

10 Squats
10 Monkey Humpers
10 American Hammers
10 Overhead Press

Kingdom 5

10 Squats
10 Monkey Humpers
10 American Hammers
10 Overhead Press
10 Merkins

Kingdom 6

10 Squats
10 Monkey Humpers
10 American Hammers
10 Overhead Press
10 Merkins
10 Bent-over Rows

Kingdom 7

10 Squats
10 Monkey Humpers
10 American Hammers
10 Overhead Press
10 Merkins
10 Bent-over Rows
10 Coupon Deadlifts

Finisher

Ring of Fire until time.

Completed exactly as planned.

The Story

The weather had already decided this workout would be memorable.

A steady downpour soaked the parking lot before the first kingdom had even been conquered.

The Bear Crawl with a Push between kingdoms turned out to be the surprise hit of the morning. There were multiple interpretations of what exactly constituted a “push,” and each HIM confidently demonstrated his own version.

Before the workout even got rolling, Zima accused YHC of creating a Game of Thrones workout despite never having watched the show. About ten minutes into the beatdown, he pointed out that most episodes would have featured considerably more nudity by this point.

Standing in a rain-soaked white shirt, YHC initially felt a little self-conscious. After Zima’s observation, however, it became clear that the PAX needed some eye candy to get through the remaining kingdoms. Sometimes leadership requires sacrifice.

The discussion then shifted to squat form.

Whiteclaw questioned whether using a coupon for squats was reserved for those with a lower IQ, noting that he and Dr. Toot appeared to be the only two performing textbook air squats.

Tar Heel quickly pointed out one important detail.

Dr. Toot wasn’t exactly empty-handed.

He was carrying a Winkee.

Not just any Winkee—a completely waterlogged Winkee.

Case closed.

Apparently, the truly intelligent men weren’t standing in a dark parking lot, in the rain, on a Monday morning, performing questionable-looking squats with either a soaking wet Winkee or a coupon in their hand.

Tour Update

Welcome to the Tour, Whiteclaw and Tar Heel.

Dr. Toot continues to apply pressure at the top of the standings.

The race is far from over.

Tour Standings

🥇 1st: Pele’

🥈 2nd: Dr. Toot

🥉 3rd: Rollback

4th: Jake 🐶

5th (tie): Starfish, Tonka & Zima

See you at the next AO.

SYITG.

— Draftee

Tour de Draftee Stop #16: Iron Throne