The House Always Wins

The House Always Wins

QIC: Subfloor/Dr. Toot

Date: 3/28/2026

PAX: @ziggy stardust @dr. toot @LockJaw @Spicoli @Head Hunter @Subfloor

Spicoli was on deck for Q at Alcatraz this week. He sent out the preblast with hints of a new exercise, the Tyson Bomber. YHC was joking in his hype that Alcatraz would start at 0715 this week, which got some laughs. Sadly, it was a little optimistic. So at 0700, the distinguish doctor took charge.

Warm-O-Rama

Mission Statement / 5 Core Principles flawlessly done by Dr. Toot

Normal time wasters also by Dr. Toot.

The Thang

Per Dr. Toot, do a Spicoli lap around the parking lot to give the scheduled Q a little more time. We arrived back at start where YHC mentioned that he would grab his F3 branded card deck. Dr. Toot led the PAX to the back parking lot for a fun merkin bear crawl around a parking space. Start with 1 merkin in the corner, bear crawl to next corner and do 2 merkins. Without changing direction, side bear crawl to corner and do 3 merkins; Crawl bear to last corner for 4 merkins and continue until finish 2 laps and 8 merkins.

At this point, in his brand spanking new shirt with the Marvel LockJaw do on it, LockJaw finally decided to join us. Something about trouble with his shoes. Not sure if it was the laces or what foot to put them on.

With a quick shuffle, YHC slapped his cards on the lot and spelled out the rules. We’ll go around flipping a card, which will indicate the exercise. Number cards are x10 reps, face x25, and very few aces are x100. Not sure the PAX saw the pattern, which was don’t pull an ace.

Lots of good cards were pulled and surprisingly well balanced between arms, legs, full body, running. Though they seemed to come in groups.

Around 45 minutes in, Spicoli arrived and showed us the above mentioned Tyson Bombers. They really did hit the spot.

Mary

None

CoT

• Toot is Q at Mayhem
• Head Hunter has birthday Q at Conspiracy, No Joke
• Tonka is Q at Alcatraz

NMM

• Toot is a true HIM and ready to lead at any time.
• Ziggy won the over/under on Spicoli’s arrival time bet over at Polymarket, where you can truly bet on anything.
• LockJaw was in true Vegas form, pulling 2 aces, one of which was pulled not from the top attempting to game the system, which we know the house always wins. Also pulled 25 burpees.
• Head Hunter was all jokes getting ready for his April 1 Q.
• Spicoli truly dropped a bomb on the Dash PAX with those Tyson Bombers which I’m sure will be making the rounds.