F3 Scares Off the Village of Clemmons Mob
QIC: Tonka
Date: 08.07.2025
PAX: Zesty (WD), Tonka (WB & QIC)
Thursday morning was far too misty and chilly and gross for August. On top of that, YHC had done some polling the night before on a sample of the WEFOCO population and as the list of nos grew, he began to anticipate a sad clown beatdown for himself. The forecasted weather and the prospect of facing it alone had him pondering more tasteful alternatives such as a comforting hot cup of coffee and slow start to the day. This daydream of a sublime cup of joe as opposed to a misty, sweaty, lonely beatdown worked its way into YHC’s psyche over the Wednesday night snooze and Thursday morning commute to the AO. So much so, he had almost entirely forgotten the possibility of a workout still loomed. As the Reader can intuit by the fact there is a BB to be read, a beatdown did occur. Here is how it went down.
YHC arrived around 0515 for a little EC walk/run in the parking lot, ever so slightly increasing work on his flighty foot bone. Upon turning into the parking lot, he was met with a pair of taillights cutting through the mist belonging to a vehicle parked at the usual launch location. Snapping to attention and coming back to earth from coffeeland, YHC remembered the task at hand, got his mind right, and prepared to meet his fellow PAX. However, the moment YHC’s headlights hit the rear window of said car, the anonymous driver throws the car in gear and speeds off through the parking lot and out on Stratford Rd never to be seen again. Could be the name of the locale and a case of confirmation bias, but bootleggers was the only reasonable explanation YHC could ascertain.
After a narrow escape from a potential run in with the Village of Clemmons mob, coffee was sounding much better for one’s health than sticking around for a beatdown. YHC settled into his walk/run wondering which coffee joint would accept his money at this hour of the morning.
0528 strikes and in comes Zesty, looking spry and energetic and ready to work. Hopes for coffee waiver, but there is sill the <3 PAX rule in YHC’s favor.
YHC mentions coffee. Zesty entertains it with a grin and a “maybe”, but it’s clear his heart is set on the work before him.
A weinke is produced and we review the prescribed suffering. The Q pulls his best bait and switch sales pitch and says, “…orrrr, we could do coffee(?!)”. No dice.
WRM
Normal stuff. (All the while the Q secretly hoped the momentum would shift in favor of coffeeteria before we reached the point of no return.)
Blocks were grabbed and to the shelter for the…
THANG
The format was a descending ladder with seven rounds, each with two superset exercises. PAX descend the ladder entirely for each round before moving to the next on the weinke. Reps were 10-8-6-4-2. Exercises were as follows:
- PULLUP/GOBLET SQUAT
- CURL/REV LUNGE (DC)
- DERKIN/THRUSTER
- BENT ROW/IRON MIKE (DC)
- SKULL CRUSHER/DEAD LIFT
- DIPS/JACK REACHERS ON THE WALL (2X REPS)
- CARDIGAN/JUMP SQUAT
Once complete, blocks were returned and back to the shelter for…
MARY
Some favorites of the PAX present were thrown out including:
Mutton Crunch
Penguin Crunch
Crunchy Frog
(YHC now noticing the fauna theme with many of these names)
TIME
COT
Prayer Requests
Safe travels for Zesty headed to a conference later that day.
YHC took us out expressing gratitude for F3 and the PAX present.
NMM
Once we arrived at round 3 (derkin/thruster), YHC made his last Doug Flutie Hail Mary pitch to coffee. The man Zesty was so in the zone, lining up and knocking down round after round, this was like the squeak of a mouse to a hurricane.
Zesty was WD for the first time in his F3 tenure. This is no easy feat as a #Hate. Quite possibly, the youngest DashPAX ever to be crowned War Daddy. Well deserved after the eye of the tiger attitude he brought to this beatdown. YHC has to admit, he was a tad jealous of the achievement.
The I-beams at the Distillery shelter did not take kindly to the pullups performed upon them. The hands of the PAX paid dearly. Blind Date, can we get some cushions added in the next round of site improvements?
Mumble Chatter included how unpleasant Cardigans are, pause vs no-pause between the squat and the press of the Thruster, does anyone really know how a dead lift is done, and some of the unique idiosyncrasies of how one pursues pastorship at a church.
This one was great 2nd F and thoroughly enjoyed. Thanks for letting me lead as the young whipper snapper I am, Zesty.
Blind Date, the mob took the keys. It’s pretty concerning actually. You can dock the ransom from my pay.
Tonka
