Do You Even Burpee Bro – 2025

Warmorama

• 25 SSH (IC)
• 4 Abogado (IC)

The Pain

• 100 Burpees
• 100 Monkey Humpers
• 100 Burpees
• 100 Overhead Arm Claps
• 100 Burpees
• 100 Merkins
• 100 Burpees
• 10 Burpees followed by a sprint
• 10 Burpees followed by a sprint

The Breakdown

• Five fine gentlemen, plus YHC, turned up ready for the challenge. Teams were chosen after a fierce game of rock-paper-scissors. Bootsie, unfortunately, lost and was stuck with me, but he took it in stride. With a grin, he said, “Get on my back, I’ll carry you.” The other teams paired up as follows: Rubber Ducky with Bagpipe, and Rollback with Van Gogh.
• The theme of the day: One team, one fight. We worked in pairs but tackled the entire workout together as a group.
• Rollback, Draftee, and Bagpipe kicked things off by getting the Burpee machine rolling. Meanwhile, Van Gogh, Bootsie, and Rubber Ducky ran to the far end of the parking lot and back. Then we switched roles.
• Each pair alternated until the first 100 burpees were knocked out. Without missing a beat, we moved on to 100 monkey humpers. Take it from me—monkey humpers might look amusing, but they’re no joke, especially alongside burpees.
• Next, we powered through another round of 100 burpees, followed by a brief break for 100 overhead arm claps.
• Then it was back to burpees—100 of them. Our legs got a momentary reprieve when we transitioned to 100 merkins.
• But as you might have guessed, we weren’t done with burpees. Another 100 were waiting for us.
• To finish strong, we wrapped things up with 10 burpees, then sprinted to the far end of the parking lot. After that, we cranked out 10 more burpees and sprinted back. Van Gogh described this finale as a “nut punch,” but I prefer to think of it as the cherry on top.

The Chatter

• Monkey humpers weren’t exactly loved by all. YHC led the charge in complaining about their placement in the routine, even filing a formal request to “speak to management.” Management, of course, never showed up.
• Overhead arm claps, on the other hand, were greeted with relief—1–2 minutes of these felt like a gift.
• Rollback observed early on that there was a refreshing breeze at one end of the parking lot, where we ran, but none at the other end, where the burpees happened.

News and Prayers

• Prayers for Van Gogh’s mother-in-law and their entire family as they navigate this challenging time together.
• Don’t forget, the second-to-last stop for the championship belt is tomorrow at Bells & Whistles. It promises to be a record-breaking beatdown—with no running involved. #SYITG