Held in a Sauna, Rain or Shine, Heat or Cold

Held in a Sauna, Rain or Shine, Heat or Cold

QIC: Tonka

Date: 07.15.2025

PAX: Bootie, Ziggy Stardust, Van Gogh, Cruiser, Crash, Drip, Lamb Chop, Root Canal, Whac-A-Mole

When Flatline calls, you answer. Boot or no boot. No excuses. YHC had this one on the calendar for a while, somewhat using it as a goal for recovery to be full strength and bring the fury of a bootless Tonka down on the unsuspecting PAX. My foot and I weren’t on the same page with that timetable, but he met me in the middle. No boot, but not quite cleared for running. We’ll need to temper the fury for a non-running Flatline, instead. Sounds easy in theory. Once the plan came together, I realized there was no ease in store. No doubt, the PAX would be crying uncle and wishing longingly for the miraculous recovery of the Q and a merciful audible to wind sprints.

Despite the months of anticipation for this Q, YHC nearly missed it entirely. I snapped awake in an anxious terror and immediately check my phone. 0505 with my alarm uselessly flashing on my phone screen in complete silence. That was close.

Jump up, grab the weinke, and out the door. I make it for the 0525 warmup and a solid posse of PAX assembles. FNG, Elijah came along bright eyed and bushy tailed.

0530. Mission statement. Core Principles. Disclaimer. Off we go.

WRM

Lunge walk the length of the parking lot.

At the far end, speed walk while arm swirly thinging toward the parking garage.

Set up shop on the first level. Mountain climbers while the Q set out the weinkes. It is noticeably stuffy. PAX complain. Q grins.

THANG

T-claps to Burns for the Q-spiration. Check out his OG version here.

Each weinke is placed beneath an I-beam for even spacing (10yd roughly) in a straight line. PAX are to perform 20 Squats at start, bear crawl to the first weinke in line, perform the listed exercise and bear crawl back to start. Repeat the 20 squats, bear crawl to the second weinke, perform exercises 1 & 2, bear crawl back. REPEATO ascending the ladder and then descending as far as time allowed.

Exercises were as follows:

20 Squats

———————–

20 Merkins

20 Reverse Lunges*

20 Alternating Box Cutters

10 Pullups

20 Supermans

*As with Burns’ first rendition: If you have to ask, yes, it’s double count.

0608. Speed walk back to start for Mary

MARY

Huck’s 3 SuperMerkins (credit: Pretty sure I got this from a VG backblast.)

• 10 count down
• 10 count superman
• 10 count up

15X IC Penguin Crunch

15X IC Low Flutters

15X IC Gas Pumps

-Round Robin to time-

VG – 15X IC Am Ham

Crash – 15X IC Box Cutters

Cruiser – 15X IC Freddie Merks

TIME

COT

Name-o-Rama

FNG Elijah is YHC’s colleague. He hails from Nebraska and is a loyal Cornhusker alum. He recently moved to NC by way of Missouri and is getting married in the next couple of months. The Q stated, “He is our team dielectric expert.” Which the attending PAX understand as, “diuretic expert”. The possibilities for names takes a dark turn from which we only narrowly escape. Ultimately, his history of fending off yard pests, such as moles and snakes among others rise to the surface. Welcome, Whac-A-Mole!

Announcements

• Rachel Ray VQ at VI, which is also his VI VQ. Rachel Ray’s VQVIVIVQ – Monday 7/21. Come on out and support this man!
• Tonka Alcatraz Q – Saturday 7/18

Prayer Requests

• VG’s family as they mourn the loss of his mother in law
• Injured and healing PAX

NMM

The resounding sentiment this morning was the parking garage is a sauna in the summer. Gracious compliments directed to the Q for his multiplication of the suffering were warmly accepted.

Van Gogh was out front all morning. He actually complained when the Q called for the return to start for MARY. He seemed to just be hitting his stride. He suspiciously lingered in the parking lot after the workout presumably to sneak back over and finish what he started once the other PAX were long gone.

Drip puts a bold smile on every workout, no matter the pain. This morning was no exception.

Ziggy Stardust said he would need to speak with YHC afterward. He mentioned “time out” in the ground hog burrow or possibly (from VG’s suggestion) some time at the blackboard repeatedly writing, “I will never work out in the parking garage in the summer again…”

Cruiser complained there were not enough pullups. He also is signing up for another adventure race. He also allegedly is skipping Ragnar because it was going to be too easy for him (I think I got that right).  He’s a friggin beast.

Bootie and I became acquainted for the first time this morning. The man put in hard work all morning and rides a motorcycle “to boot”. Respect.

Root Canal had the PAX captivated with a story mid-beatdown that sounded riveting. Something about him getting passed by infants in a tough mudder race. It’s possible I confused a couple details.

Whac-A-Mole will fit right in. Shot out of the cannon at the start like he’d done this 100 times. Add in some stamina and he’ll live out front.

Lamb Chop is nursing a shoulder injury and protested the parking garage venue when he would not be able to partake in the pullups. The poor guy suffered without the joys. He was a real trooper.

Crash and YHC have bonded over our “foot bone” challenges. We’ve gone from busted bone buddies to boot brothers and now on to tennis shoe teammates. It’s been a pleasure journeying with you.

YHC chose this workout selfishly to cater to my non-running abilities, but the PAX quickly humbled me with their feats of strength and speed. Thanks for the push, gents.

Van Gogh, the keys melted down in the parking garage. Thanks for letting me lead this morning, fellas.

Tonka