{"id":15543,"date":"2021-04-16T12:41:58","date_gmt":"2021-04-16T16:41:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/?p=15543"},"modified":"2021-04-16T13:07:30","modified_gmt":"2021-04-16T17:07:30","slug":"unisex-leggings-are-not-a-thing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/2021\/04\/unisex-leggings-are-not-a-thing\/","title":{"rendered":"Unisex Leggings Are NOT a Thing"},"content":{"rendered":"

WARMUP.\u00a0\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n

SSH x 15 IC<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

BEATDOWN.<\/b><\/p>\n

3 sets<\/span><\/p>\n

1 minute on \/ 20 seconds off<\/span><\/p>\n

2 minutes run\/rest between sets<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Exercises<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Shot Block Squats<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. Knee-to-Ground Reverse Lunges<\/span><\/li>\n
  3. Box Jumps<\/span><\/li>\n
  4. Burpees<\/span><\/li>\n
  5. WMDs<\/span><\/li>\n
  6. Dips<\/span><\/li>\n
  7. Spider Merkins<\/span><\/li>\n
  8. Box Cutters<\/span><\/li>\n
  9. Crunches<\/span><\/li>\n
  10. Pickle Pounders<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

     <\/p>\n

    DONE.<\/b><\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n

    ANNOUNCEMENTS:<\/b><\/p>\n

      \n
    • Starfish has Supermax\/Alcatraz tomorrow<\/span><\/li>\n
    • Supermax\/Alcatraz t-shirts shipped yesterday<\/span><\/li>\n
    • Q School is on May 15, 7am, ROCC<\/span><\/li>\n
    • Turnberry Open CSAUP is at Tanglewood next Sunday<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

       <\/p>\n

      NAKED MAN MOLESKIN:<\/b><\/p>\n

        \n
      • Today\u2019s workout was designed to allow each person to challenge themselves in whatever manner they should so choose.\u00a0 Want to go for number of reps?\u00a0 Do it.\u00a0 Want to improve form?\u00a0 Today\u2019s the day.\u00a0 Want to get that heart rate up?\u00a0 I\u2019m sure you can.\u00a0 Want to virtually give the middle finger to the Q and modify every exercise because they\u2019re too easy?\u00a0 Ugh.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • The doctors quarantined themselves together off-stage because they didn\u2019t want to be around the decrepit commoners.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Pita never stopped talking.\u00a0 Toe Tag made self-deprecating comments.\u00a0 Hedwig giggled.\u00a0 (I may have copied that sentence from every single backblast I\u2019ve ever written with any one of those three present.)<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Snooki just plainly wanted nothing to do with the rest of us and worked out basically alone, off in the distance.\u00a0 If not for the \u201clet\u2019s whip it out and measure\u201d competition between him and Cheesesteak to see who could modify the exercises to make them harder, I\u2019m not sure I would have realized he was there.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Thank you Captain Obvious, but Van Gogh dominated the beatdown with pretty darn good form.\u00a0 After some jerk suggested to him that doing lunges without the use of hands on thighs is more effective, he conveniently switched his workout location to directly behind a pole so that said jerk didn\u2019t have a viewing angle to make any other helpful comments.\u00a0 By the end, having not even broken a sweat, he admitted that there were a lot of reps.\u00a0 I\u2019m pretty sure he was headed home to do a kettlebell workout next.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • I incorrectly assumed that Cheesesteak, Burns, and Lamb Chop were only amateur horticulturalists.\u00a0 Oh no, I was wrong.\u00a0 They have clearly risen to master levels and were not shy about discussing composting the ENTIRE time.\u00a0 However, some of their methods seem to be scientifically on par with QAnon doctrine.\u00a0 In the presence of such expertise, I was too afraid to inform them about winning the 7th grade state science fair with my experiment of The Effects of Composting with Carbonaceous Versus Non-Carbonaceous Materials.\u00a0 Hint: worms and dead leaves are the key.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Post Hole was most helpful in \u201cencouraging\u201d and \u201cmotivating\u201d the Q to push it all the way until the end of the timer.\u00a0 Why he was watching the Q and the clock instead of doing his own exercises is another question for another time.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Razzie uses mental telepathy to send evil thoughts in the Q\u2019s direction.\u00a0 It\u2019s easier that way so he didn\u2019t waste any energy yammering unkind words, but used it all to muscle through the workout.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Stop me if you\u2019ve heard this one, but Cheesesteak did his own thing.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • And speaking of Cheesesteak, he complained that his heart rate never got above 50 BPM, but let me remind The Philly Special that this tabata style format is \u201cYou vs You\u201d.\u00a0 Mr. Steak was in complete control of his own intensity level, but instead chose to try out for Auntie Anne\u2019s new menu item and turn himself into a human pretzel.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • There needs to be a better definition of unisex leggings than, \u201cWhen you wear them, you\u2019re going to have sex with yourself.\u201d\u00a0 Or does there?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

         <\/p>\n

        PRAYERS:<\/b><\/p>\n

          \n
        • For all those unsaid.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

           <\/p>\n

          Zima Out.<\/span><\/p>\n

           <\/p>\n

          @Posthole, the keys are in @Lamb Chop\u2019s compost pile when you want them.\u00a0 When you stick your hand in to retrieve them, just beware – he adds his own \u201cbiodegradable material\u201d.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

          WARMUP.\u00a0\u00a0 SSH x 15 IC   BEATDOWN. 3 sets 1 minute on \/ 20 seconds off 2 minutes run\/rest between sets   Exercises Shot Block Squats Knee-to-Ground Reverse Lunges Box Jumps Burpees WMDs Dips Spider Merkins Box Cutters Crunches Pickle Pounders   DONE.   ANNOUNCEMENTS: Starfish has Supermax\/Alcatraz tomorrow Supermax\/Alcatraz t-shirts shipped yesterday Q School […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":200,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[91],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15543","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-urban-assault"],"acf":{"q":"Zima","date":"4\/16\/21","pax":"Razzie, Burns, Lamb Chop, Pita, Cheesesteak, Snooki, Hedwig, Van Gogh, Toe Tag, Post Hole, Zima (Q)"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15543","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/200"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15543"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15543\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15546,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15543\/revisions\/15546"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15543"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15543"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15543"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}