{"id":13507,"date":"2020-10-15T12:47:20","date_gmt":"2020-10-15T16:47:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/?p=13507"},"modified":"2020-10-15T12:47:20","modified_gmt":"2020-10-15T16:47:20","slug":"this-hurts-me-more-than-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/2020\/10\/this-hurts-me-more-than-you\/","title":{"rendered":"This Hurts Me More Than You"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><b>Warmarama.<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">a mishmash of perfectly cadenced exercises<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">At this point in our morning, young Mr. Lamb Chop was bestowed with great power.\u00a0 Presented with three options as to the site of the actual beatdown, he consensually &#8211; and under his own volition &#8211; chose to send the innocent PAX over to the mountainous behemoth known as Pilot View rather than the flat tundra confined by the Hanes Park running track or the relatively less inclined Intimidator hill.\u00a0 Let me repeat that.\u00a0 Lamb Chop willingly chose Pilot View.\u00a0 There are witnesses.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Off we went, cursing the lad and wondering if the years of Millennial living in his parents\u2019 basement were rotting his cognitive abilities.\u00a0 Mutton was quietly disavowing all evidence of an actual blood relationship between the two.\u00a0 Razzie was pissed none of the other #Conspiracy regulars showed up and I swear I heard him wonder out loud if he could make it over to #Mayhem.\u00a0 Huckleberry asked for the keys to my truck so he could go wait in it with the heat on.\u00a0 Only The H.O.G. seemed excited and we all know that something isn\u2019t right with that boy.\u00a0 Keep in mind, we had only finished up a superb warmarama and hadn\u2019t even started the real beatdown yet.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">On the mosey over to Pilot View, I had to perform some quick mental Q gymnastics and reformulate the workout because although I knew the choices I would present to Lamb Chop, never in my wildest ale-fueled dreams, did I imagine he would voluntarily choose Pilot View.\u00a0 I had assumed we\u2019d be over by the track, but you know what happens when you ass-u-me.\u00a0 So as not to keep you in suspense, the workout turned out quite nicely, if I do say so myself.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><b>Beatdown.<\/b><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Here\u2019s how the beatdown went down downtown up then down Pilot View.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">The group performed a set of <\/span><b>10 Burpees<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400\"> at each intersection then proceeded to the next intersection and <\/span><b>Heels to Heaven\u2019<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">ed for the six.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">There was definitely a trade-off between form and speed today because there was a \u201cpenalty\u201d for being the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">five<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\"> or the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">six<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u00a0 As always, the Q implored the PAX to use proper form on the exercises, but the thrill of speed was too much for some to handle.\u00a0 The question to be answered was \u2026 \u201cWho felt the brunt of the penalty?\u00a0 The one who doled it out or the one who received it?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"text-decoration: underline\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Penalty<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"list-style-type: none\">\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">If you were the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">five<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">, with a heavy heart you had to pick one of your brothers to do ONE extra <\/span><b>Burpee<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400\"> next round.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">If you were the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">six<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">, with a heavy heart you had to pick one of your brothers to do TWO extra <\/span><b>Burpees<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400\"> next round.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Note: The same person could not have penalty Burpees levied upon them on back-to-back rounds.<\/span><\/i><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">West End Boulevard:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>Regular Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Carolina Avenue: <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>Hand Release Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Jersey Avenue:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>HR, Donkey Kick Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Summit Street:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>HR, Prison Cell (Mountain Climber), DK Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Broad Street:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>HR, PC, DK, Knee Tuck Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Summit Street:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>HR, PC, DK, KT, Side Jump Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Jersey Avenue:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>HR, PC, DK, KT, 180\u00b0 SJ Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Carolina Avenue:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>Double Merkin, HR, PC, DK, KT, 180\u00b0 SJ Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">West End Boulevard:<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>DM, HR, Rollover after each Merkin, PC, DK, KT, 180\u00b0 SJ Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Carolina Avenue: <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>DM, HR, RO, PC, DK, KT, 180\u00b0 SJ, Top Clap Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Intimidator (AMRAP):<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><b>DM, HR plus Clap, RO, PC, DK, KT, 180\u00b0 SJ, TC Burpees<\/b><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">FINISHED.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><b>ANNOUNCEMENTS:<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Drip did not post and likely fartsacked.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><b>NAKED MAN MOLESKIN:<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">The hand releases allowed a brief moment of rest.\u00a0 Some PAX interpreted the word, \u201cbrief\u201d, more liberally than others.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Double rollovers plus 180\u00b0 jumps almost led to some unfortunate accidents on the not-at-all flat surfaces of Pilot View.\u00a0 Honestly, I only heard the screams of the other PAX as I was too dizzy to actually pay attention to anyone else.\u00a0 Just ask H.O.G., who I almost took out on more than one occasion with my not-so-well-balanced rollovers.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Who voluntarily chooses to run up Pilot View?<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">It was not fun to dole out the penalty burpees to one of your brothers.\u00a0 A few of the kinder PAX even tried to jump on the grenade themselves.\u00a0 But no.\u00a0 Mean Mr. Q would not allow that.\u00a0 The penalty was that you have to choose punishment for <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">someone else<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u00a0 Pay attention to the rules!<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Absolutely in no way related to the above bullet point, where was Palin this morning?\u00a0 Man, I wish Palin had posted to his favorite AO.\u00a0 And Cherry Pie too?\u00a0 That rascal.\u00a0 Aren\u2019t those guys stalwarts of Conspiracy?\u00a0 I mean Drip, I get \u2026 kind of, but don\u2019t even get me started on Glazer.\u00a0 Does that dude workout anymore?\u00a0 Did we leave the parking lot too early for Spicoli?\u00a0 Did Picnic Basket not wake up Boo Boo in time?\u00a0 Where were all these regulars that I\u2019ve heard so much about.\u00a0 Where were all of my long lost friends who I never get to see anymore?\u00a0 Is that the true Conspiracy?\u00a0 At least the Site Q and the first family of Heating, Cooling, and Plumbing didn\u2019t leave the Alamo undefended against the Mayhem invasion.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">I will type the next sentence in all caps.\u00a0 IT TOOK UNTIL AT LEAST STATION EIGHT, MAYBE NINE, BEFORE HUCK WAS THE SIX FOR BURPEES.\u00a0 We threw everything we had at him &#8211; penalty burpees, his kryptonite of running up insane hills, comments on form, trying to mess with his count.\u00a0 If that didn\u2019t work, next up were cinder blocks on his feet and a weight vest.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">In other news, I don\u2019t recall The H.O.G. ever being the six.\u00a0 There might be something to that nickname.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Lamb Chop was never far behind the lead, if not in the lead.\u00a0 Either those P.E.D.s are really paying off or the Common Core math that he probably learned when he was in 5th grade last week taught him to count by 3s.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Someone please figure out a way to drain Mutton\u2019s engine.\u00a0 He might have not been in the lead on every single round, but there was no fatigue on the man\u2019s face.\u00a0 Not only was his cadence steady and unwavering the entire time, but he VOLUNTEERED for penalty burpees.\u00a0 Who does that?\u00a0 Was the original beatdown not hard enough.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">I chose not to call out Razzie in the heat of battle, but he calmly figured out a way to game the system this morning.\u00a0 Clearly only feigning tiredness, he smoothly and strategically picked his finishing order so as not to arouse attention and be given too many penalty burpees.\u00a0 I could see him adjust his speed right before each intersection with obvious fake stumbling to finish in the safety of the group, then complete the charade by placing his hands on his knees and acting out the appropriate level of shortness of breath.\u00a0 Unfortunately, he foiled his own plan by also volunteering for penalty burpees.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Lamb Chop requested another special birthday beatdown.\u00a0 He knows it\u2019s on a Tuesday, but is unsure of the actual date.\u00a0 That\u2019s our Lamb Chop.\u00a0 He\u2019s special.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><b>PRAYERS.<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Drip had a successful surgery.\u00a0 TMI alert: Prayers for his boys.\u00a0 <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Wait, boys plural?\u00a0 How many sons does he have?\u00a0 Oh \u2026.., nevermind.<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">\u00a0 Heal up brother.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Prayers up for $5.\u00a0 Let\u2019s do what we can to support him.\u00a0 Bring him beers, go for walks with him, toilet paper his house for Halloween.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Zima Out.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Warmarama. a mishmash of perfectly cadenced exercises &nbsp; At this point in our morning, young Mr. Lamb Chop was bestowed with great power.\u00a0 Presented with three options as to the site of the actual beatdown, he consensually &#8211; and under his own volition &#8211; chose to send the innocent PAX over to the mountainous behemoth [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":200,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[112,82],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13507","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bootcamp","category-conspiracy"],"acf":{"q":"Zima","date":"10\/14\/2020","pax":"Mutton, Huckleberry, The H.O.G., Lamb Chop, Razzie, Zima (Q)"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13507","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/200"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13507"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13507\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13518,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13507\/revisions\/13518"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13507"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13507"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13507"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}