{"id":11552,"date":"2020-02-10T14:14:37","date_gmt":"2020-02-10T18:14:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/?p=11552"},"modified":"2020-02-10T14:14:37","modified_gmt":"2020-02-10T18:14:37","slug":"lambchop-party","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/2020\/02\/lambchop-party\/","title":{"rendered":"It\u2019s Lambchop\u2019s Party and He\u2019ll Cry If He Wants To"},"content":{"rendered":"

Introduction.<\/b><\/p>\n

You would cry too if \u2026 you did what we did.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What a crappy birthday party! Lambchop, you need some better friends.\u00a0 What about, \u201cLet\u2019s meet in a dark parking lot to torture your body in a deserted park at an ungodly hour of the morning in freezing cold weather to celebrate your birthday\u201d made you want to venture to a place that you, admittedly, have never been to before?\u00a0 On top of that, some angry little man threatened your manhood because of the size of your kettlebell, ordered you to Bear Crawl (and exercise you detest), and then demanded you do a ridiculously stupid number of repititions of less-than-easy exercises. And \u2026 look at the presents these so-called-friends brought.\u00a0 Banged up kettlebells and chipped cinder blocks. No wonder you returned them faster than the day after Christmas rush at Macy\u2019s. Man, I hope your real friends throw you a way cooler party.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

On another note, it was a seriously STRONG group that attended this morning.\u00a0 I mean, every single person was in #BeastMode. Speed and strength were combined with fantastic form.\u00a0 I\u2019m not even being facetious. Seriously. Pretty freaking amazing.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what we did.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Beatdown.<\/b><\/p>\n

Some kind of warmup.\u00a0 I think Bevo was less than enthused at the small number of exercises performed.\u00a0 What can I say? We had real work to do. Much to Turnover\u2019s pleasure, we did not celebrate Lambchop\u2019s 29th birthday with 29 warmup Burpees.\u00a0 Just 5 to get the blood flowing.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As we made our way to the tennis courts, the lights went off.\u00a0 Perfect. No matter. We had work to do.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

YHC informed the PAX that the goal was to continue each exercise until Lambchop started crying.\u00a0 Disturbingly, the PAX were honestly unsure if YHC was kidding or not. For the record, I was. It was only a joke.\u00a0 I did feel (sort of) bad when I saw the fear on BabyFace.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The real goal was to pair up exercises on the far ends of the tennis court.\u00a0 Do the first exercise on Side A 40 times, use the mode of transportation to get to the other side, and then do the second exercise on Side B 10 times.\u00a0 Decrease Side A by 10 reps and increase Side B by 10 reps. The total reps always equals 50. Slow recovery mosey around the court fence line if finished before the six.\u00a0 Move onto the next pairing. Easy peasy. Go.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
SIDE A<\/b><\/span><\/th>\nTRANSPORT<\/b><\/span><\/th>\nSIDE B<\/b><\/span><\/th>\n<\/tr>\n
Hand Release Merkins<\/td>\nWeighted Mosey<\/td>\nMary Katherines<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Heels to Heaven<\/td>\nBear Crawl<\/td>\nCoupon Curls (knees)<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Coupon Swings<\/td>\nWeighted Mosey<\/td>\nCoupon Thrusters<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Weighted Low Dollies<\/td>\nSprint<\/td>\nBurpees<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
40, 30, 20, 10<\/b><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

 <\/p>\n

Mumble Chatter:<\/b><\/p>\n

    \n
  • The most shocking thing about this entire workout was the lack of comments from the boys.\u00a0 Sure, there were a few words sprinkled here and there, but it was a strangely quiet bunch. Mostly grunts and telepathic harmful thoughts directed towards the Q.\u00a0 Nothing out of the ordinary. There is a greater than even chance that I was simply not listening, but I don\u2019t think I heard a single word from Greenspan or Huckleberry.\u00a0 Need I be worried?<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Next time we do this, Van Gogh needs to use not one, but two 75 lb kettlebells, ankle weights, a weighted vest, and a chain around his neck.\u00a0 Maybe, just maybe, we\u2019ll be able to keep up with him then.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • A couple of crazies put in some EC miles before the workout.\u00a0 This is getting a little out of hand gentlemen.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Lambchop is looking to recycle this workout and Q it in 29 years to see how another newly-minted 29 year old does with it.\u00a0 Somebody wheel me out of the nursing home so I can watch the show. And dammit, where\u2019s Thistle when I want to make an old man in a retirement village joke??<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Everyone made it through 2 rounds of Low Dollies and 1 of Burpees to end the workout.\u00a0 Although, while the rest of the PAX only did 10 Burpees, it was rumored that Huck did all 100 in the same amount of time.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • An unnamed PAX was attempting to play the Happy Birthday song using flatulence as the instrument of choice.\u00a0 It might have been in response to Turnover\u2019s critique of the Q not providing music.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • \u201cI\u2019m going to call you Daddy from now on.\u201d\u00a0 – Lambchop to Zima. Ummm???!?!?! I promised him that wouldn\u2019t make the backblast.\u00a0 Oops. I lied.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Exactly one PAX (and no, it wasn\u2019t the Q) wants to redo this workout for an hour long session so we can finish the last set of exercises.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

     <\/p>\n

    Announcements.<\/b><\/p>\n

      \n
    • Van Gogh has the Q at Flatline on Tuesday.<\/span><\/li>\n
    • Turnover has the Q at WIB on Thursday.<\/span><\/li>\n
    • Wiseman.\u00a0 Wednesday.\u00a0 6:00. Lambchop is launching a new group called Echelon.\u00a0 As described by the Workout Baby this morning, \u201cIt\u2019s a young professionals group of uhhh, young professionals.\u201d\u00a0 Can\u2019t get more clear than that. Let\u2019s just say that YHC missed the cut. Not sure if it was the \u2018young\u2019 or the \u2018professional\u2019 part though.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

       <\/p>\n

      Prayers.\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n

        \n
      • A fellow member of our PAX might be EHing his brand spanking new FNG.\u00a0 More information to come. Keep the family in your thoughts.<\/span><\/li>\n
      • Bevo stepped up to bring us out with encouraging and thoughtful words.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

         <\/p>\n

        Zima out.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

        Introduction. You would cry too if \u2026 you did what we did.   What a crappy birthday party! Lambchop, you need some better friends.\u00a0 What about, \u201cLet\u2019s meet in a dark parking lot to torture your body in a deserted park at an ungodly hour of the morning in freezing cold weather to celebrate your […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":200,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[112,76],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11552","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bootcamp","category-the-outhouse"],"acf":{"q":"Zima","date":"2\/10\/2020","pax":"Lambchop (birthday boy, WB), Turnover, Huckleberry, Greenspan, Bevo, Van Gogh, Zima (WD, Q)"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11552","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/200"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11552"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11552\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11567,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11552\/revisions\/11567"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11552"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11552"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.f3winstonsalem.com\/f3\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11552"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}